First off, I just want to say I hope you all had the best possible Christmas, it’s crazy to think that we’re nearly two weeks into 2018 already! This can only mean one thing, it’s time for my first blog of the year, so sit back, relax and I hope you enjoy reading!
One thing that’s getting to me more than ever this year, is this “new year, new me” sh*t. If there’s one positive thing that you take from my first blog of the year, it’s that PLEASE don’t think you need to follow that stupid trend! I want you to remember that, you can still aim to achieve the goals you set last year. I know how difficult it is to create long term goals with Mental Health, but always remember that setting, daily or even hourly goals is just as important.
I am struggling so far this year, with my mental health and specifically my Anorexia. I am already getting the ‘you just nee to try’ or ‘you just need to eat, you don’t have a choice’. Oh, trust me when I say, I KNOW what you think, I KNOW how you feel and I KNOW it just looks like I am not complying with my meal plan. But, let me just say… I AM TRYING, it might not look like it but it really is easier said than done. That’s why an Eating Disorder exists, that’s what it does!! It gets into your mind and twists everything, like a manipulating little monster, it makes you not believe anything being said to you here on the outside world. However, nagging me about it DOES NOT HELP THE SITUATION, it just makes me angry and puts me off food even more. I know some of you who will read this will relate with what I am saying, so stay strong and feel free to share!
This year I have got some challenging as well as exciting things ahead, as well as another load of appointments! So far, I am getting ready to go to the ‘Recovery Education Centre’ and carry on with my counselling and CBT sessions. I haven’t set myself any goals that I know are unrealistic or that I can’t reach yet. I want to carry on trying my best with recovery and get a group of people around me, to help me holistically (big word for me I know😂) look after myself. I’m not in this world for the drama at all, I’m in it to do what makes me happy! I’ve got a new best friend in my life, who has shown me what a true best friend, without the drama looks like and I couldn’t be happier… Shoutout to you Amelia, you’re amazing! I think this could be one of my hardest years yet, recovery wise but I’ve got no other choice but to face it.
Recently, I have a new positivity adventure that is a bit like the ‘Elf On The Shelf’. I have a new toy unicorn called Ula, she’s here for peace, positivity and happiness during 2018. Everyday we take a picture with Ula of what we’ve done for the day, like shopping, travels, appointments etc. This is so that, I can look back at the end of the year and see the positive things throughout the storm of mental health. If you have me on any social media you can see Ula’s adventures. If not, I will try and upload as many pictures as possible on here, so you can stay up to date too!
So here’s to 2018, it’s a battle already, but when have I ever given up without a fight?! Thank you all for continuing to support me and for following my journey. It’s been two years since wrote my first blog, but I know for a fact that I certainly won’t be stopping writing to you all anytime soon! I hope you all have a year filled with happiness, positivity and pink and sparkly magic, you really do deserve it.
Lots Of Love,
Iesha 💙 (P.S, a picture of Ula’s antics are below!)